Reviewed by Scott Swan

Three years later, in 1984, I was more than ready for the sequel/prequel to RAIDERS, a little movie called INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM.  In fact, I was salivating.  Again, my ass was blown off and my world was rocked.  At the time most moviegoers had no complaints, but in the years to follow more than a few critics have voiced gripes.  They complained that it’s no RAIDERS.  And now, these days, the backlash seems to have subsided for some reason.  I will admit, after years of reflection: It’s definitely not the same kind of ride as RAIDERS, and it’s not a classic in the same ways.  However, it is sincere about keeping the audience entertained at all times.  And that goes a long way.

Five years would pass before Indiana Jones resurfaced again.  The summer of 1989 brought us INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE, which was, at the time, presumably the farewell to the main character and franchise.  Both Harrison Ford and director Steven Spielberg, in the years since TEMPLE OF DOOM, made significant and challenging strides away from INDY creator George Lucas’s tone and sensibilities.  Spielberg directed THE COLOR PURPLE and EMPIRE OF THE SUN, while Ford starred in WITNESS and THE MOSQUITO COAST.  Artistically, for them, returning to the Saturday matinee trappings must have felt like a serious step in reverse.  The obscene payday, however, probably did much to cushion the pain and humiliation and does explain quite a bit.  The movie was more from the mold of RAIDERS rather than TEMPLE OF DOOM.  It brought back characters Marcus Brody and Sallah from the first film, and introduced Indy’s Dad, played by Sean Connery, and Young Indy played by the late River Phoenix .  Overall, the third chapter in the saga is acceptable, but a far cry from the brilliance of the first film and the spectacle of the second.

Then Indiana Jones disappeared.

The 1990’s came and went.  Vague, substantiated rumblings of a new INDY movie were heard around the middle of the 2000’s.  Zealots pissed their pants and doubters doubted.  The safe bet, it appeared, was that Professor Jones would not return.  After all, who really wants to see a sixty-five year old Harrison Ford wearing that fedora and cracking a whip?  In my mind I saw it like those Gilligan’s Island reunion movies of the late 1970’s, with Gilligan and The Skipper looking too elderly for the gags and still wearing the same old clothes. Thanks...but no thanks.

Then in late 2007, pictures of Harrison in costume from the set of the fourth INDY installment hit the Internet.  With actual, irrefutable photographic evidence it appeared to be true.  There he was.  Dressed as Indy.  And guess what – he actually looked pretty good.  But the big question still loomed: How bad would the movie turn out?

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL isn’t so bad, actually, despite having the clumsiest title (I prefer RAIDERS OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL, myself) and some of the most cringe worthy moments in the entire series.  In fact, I’ll even say it’s a good movie with some really great moments.  At its worst, it’s exactly what I feared it would be: Alan Hale Jr. in that blue shirt and skipper hat.  At its best, it’s more than I could have ever hoped for: A chance to be eleven years old again and be transported back to a movie theater in 1981.

SPOILERS AHEAD

Indiana Jones has a son, played by Shia LaBeouf.  Karen Allen returns as Marion Ravenwood.  Marcus Brody and Henry Jones are dead.  Indy’s still afraid of snakes.  The Russians are the bad guys.  There are giant, flesh-eating South American ants.  Indy survives an atomic blast by climbing into a lead-lined refrigerator.  And at the end of the movie a giant 50’s style flying saucer takes off and Indy and Marion are at long last wed.

END OF SPOILERS

I think the only way to lay out my reactions to the film would be to break it down into report cards for the key creative players.  Here it goes...

HARRISON FORD.  He was by far my biggest fear/concern about the film.  Even if the script was great (it’s not) and Spielberg was on his game (he’s not), the film would have ultimately been unwatchable if Harrison wasn’t up to the Everest-like test of stepping into the role again.  Thank Christ Ford appears more than capable and, in fact, totally at ease and in his element again.  He certainly looks his age, but he’s in surprisingly great shape for such an old bastard.  But most importantly, he brings a crucial ingredient – that old Harrison Ford magic that made the original Indy portrayals and his work as Han Solo so special.  I personally believe he’s got at least one more Indy outing in him if they act quickly. He more than holds up his end of the bargain and I have no complaints.  FINAL GRADE: A.

STEVEN SPIELBERG.  It’s safe to say that the last ten years for Spielberg have been less than spectacular.  He’s a great director, even when he’s terrible.  But recently he’s been more terrible than great.  It’s like he switched to auto-pilot after the massive successes of JURASSIC PARK and SCHINDLER’S LIST and everything since has been an imitation of great Spielberg.  Maybe he’s tired.   Maybe he’s lost inspiration.  Maybe his dog died.  I don’t know.  Here, it seems, he did what he could on set to appear, well, Spielbergish.  Sadly, it feels like returning to the helm was more of an obligation than a joy.  If you watch the behind the scenes stuff from TEMPLE OF DOOM, he looks like a director who loves every second of what he’s doing.  Like a child with a new box of toys.  I don’t get that feeling from the behind the scenes stuff here.  But honestly, after forty years of blockbusters, what more can we ask of the guy?  He does a decent enough job pretending to do his old moves, I suppose, and there are moments of inspiration which genuinely hearken back to ‘81.  FINAL GRADE: B minus.

 

GEORGE LUCAS.  Oh, boy.  George Lucas is George Lucas and it’s almost impossible to grade him.  Somebody once said that only George Lucas can take a green light studio picture and turn it into a development deal.  This is, I believe, a testament to the fact that George Lucas has a head like a rock.  More respectfully put, George Lucas won’t do anything George Lucas doesn’t want to do.  Period.  And that’s, as they say, that.  And if halting the process and postponing a lucrative deal is the only way for him to “put things right,” then that’s exactly what he’ll do.  There’s no way this movie would’ve been made without Lucas signing off on every crucial aspect, and therefore, he deserves much of the credit and perhaps all of the blame.  It’s often hard to defend his choices, but I’m sure he’s not remotely interested in having anyone, especially me, defend him.  He makes the movies he wants to make and I’m certain he couldn’t be happier.  INDY 4, compared to the recent STAR WARS prequels, is absolute genius.  So this is a step up for him.  Compared to RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK, however, it’s kind of a retarded mess.  The end result is sort of like if a chimpanzee made spaghetti.  It might be all over the walls and floor, but still, there’s no argument, it’s spaghetti.  FINAL GRADE: C plus.

DAVID KOEPP.  This is the last guy who needs to be blamed or congratulated for anything.  Good for him for landing the job and getting final screenplay credit, but in the end he’s just doing the bidding of his evil overlords – which is usually no easy task.  There are many missed opportunities, but it’s hardly his fault.  There are also many nice touches, which could also not be his fault.  FINAL GRADE: B.

In the end, none of these talented individuals care what I grade them.  These are merely my personal reactions to their contributions to this particular piece of work. 

DVD EXTRAS

If you’re going to pick up this DVD, make sure to splurge and get the 2 DISC set.  If comes down to either buying food for the week or buying the 2 DISC version, you can always find something to eat for free in fast food trash bins.  In a way, the documentaries are more interesting than the film itself (a compliment I paid to the EPISODE I DVD).  But rather than overshadow it, the documentaries here serve to deepen my appreciation for the all the hard work and artistry that went into crafting the feature.

Disc 1 special features include:  “The Return of a Legend,” the evolution of the new film and a tribute to the legendary hero and his creators; and “Pre-Production,” which follows Steven Spielberg as he creates animatic sequences, Shia LaBeouf as he learns to swordfight and captures the reunion of filmmakers and cast on the soundstage.  Disc 2 special features include:  “Production Diary: Making Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,” a 12-part look at the making of the film; and “Pre-Visualization Sequences.”  Also included are galleries and trailers.  This DVD is enhanced for 16:9 TVs and is mastered in Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround -- which is all, of course, to be expected.

FINAL VERDICT

The movie: not great, but certainly not bad.  The DVD: awesome.  Steven Spielberg: a little tired maybe?  George Lucas: it’s spaghetti.  Harrison Ford: gettin’ up there.  Indiana Jones: still got it.

 

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